nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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