BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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