So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
