Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
