I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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