He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Of course I have a pirate flag
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
