yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
