Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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