Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize