uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
