Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
