I am puke
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize
