he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
