Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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