You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
