fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize