I forgot how hot balto sounded
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
