Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
