OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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