We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize