K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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