Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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