My friends, they love my intelligence
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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