Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Randomize
