Umm I'm too high to move.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Randomize
