I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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