im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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