stop calling my apartment porn island.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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