pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
