4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
thus making me awesome and them whores
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
