Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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