Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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