I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Randomize