yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
