Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
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