try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Randomize
