Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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