Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize