Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize