I think my vagina is haunted
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
