It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
