I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
