Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
You are a genius and a whore.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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