I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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