the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
