Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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