like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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