We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
