Walk of Shame. In a state park.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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