He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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