You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize