i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I didn't notice because vodka
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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