I'm lost and stupid without you.
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
